She rarely wanted things but there were those
she admired and wanted their affection but
when it never came, each was another brick
in the wall of cynicism mortared
by the glue of self-doubt.

“Desire is a tricky thing, the boiling of the
body’s wants.”

What we want and do not get can lead to
sarcasm, obsession, disparagement, skepticism,
contempt, pessimism but also asceticism and self-restraint.
The coin of character is not flipped but established
on how we choose to respond, on understanding
“that we lose even what we never had.”